In most relationships we are living around what the other wants or we are a slave to the feelings of the other person . Sometimes we forgot ourselves and it is hard to get that back to remember that we are in a relationship too not just the other person. What I mean by this is have a look at what you have done for yourself in the past few weeks months years even… when was the last time you actually was able and didnt feel guilty for wanting to be able to do something you want…

This is a huge part in relationships that people over look why because it is easier to not admit and just get on with things .But when you look at it that is when recentments come into the relationship and you cant find what it is you want or even feel …

So this is now the time for you to stop and sort out what you are doing in your life and how you maintain or even stay within a relationship. If I was to tell you to do at least one thing for yourself a day you would most likely laugh because when are you going to find time to do that?

Well if you stopped the thinking and the emotional rollercoaster or stopped doing one thing for anyone during the day that took you away from the "my time" a day you would find a spare 5 minutes or hour to just be you for that short period to get back to you keep yourself in check…

To do this sometimes you need to slow down the thought patterns so taking time out to just close your eyes and think nothing see what is behind those eyes is it black or coloured is it gold?

Find that color behind your eyes and you will see that is the start to you slowing the mind down long enough for you to escape from the kaos that is happening around you so you can see alot more clearly.

The first time you do this you will not suddenly "wake up and smell the coffee" but you will see change happen over time that you can take the little bit of time out to just be or to find the peace you wouldnt get from anything else. See we are so busy with what others want and need that we do forget that we are here and we have needs wether they be little or big we still have a need for things emotionally & mentally that we cannot get from another person.

Time out for self is important take five minutes when you can just to be no one but yourself and see the differance it will make to your thinking and feeling about your own situations you will see it so clearly!

Now another thing you have to start to do after you have learnt how to take time for self is to be able to communicate your feelings and wants clearly .

To do this you have to learn what it is you do want and need from the other person and knowing that they will have wants and needs themselves and learning how to balance it all out with communication is the best way to deal with all things…

See alot of people forget if you dont communicate the other person will not know and it is not about hurting another persons feelings at all it is about you getting some self confidence to be able to talk about the important things to you .. If the other person doesnt want to hear what your needs or wants are you have to really question why you are with this person why are you there what are you getting from this relationship and what have they done or said to you that has made you feel good about being within the relationship or about yourself.

See relationships are about sharing and being able to maintian your own self independence and being able to be who you are without hiding your thoughts & feelings .

If you are living without being who you want to be it is time to change!